Now Where was I??
Oh, the joy! I finally have time in my schedule to write a regular blog for the website. I can not tell you how refreshing this feels. Since summer of 2023 I had to put writing on the back burner (the way back burner) as we were making the decision to close our store and deciding what our future would look like as unemployed people. I felt like a failure on so many levels. I felt incomplete. I felt so…. yucky. How could I possibly write without just vomiting on the page of my turmoil? That’s not me so I just didn’t write. And my soul suffered. Until now (insert smiley face!)
My days, and Terry’s as well, have found a marvelous rhythm of healthy sleep habits, eating meals together, heading to our respective studios to work, and reconvening at the end of the day for conversation and reflection. He is doing what brings him joy and I am doing the same. Terry frequently reminds me, “Do what you love, and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” We embrace that mantra and somehow, we’ll figure out the financial part of it all.
Writing a blog for the website was/is a passion, a desire, and relative content. I want you to know yoga, I want you to see a different perspective on life, I want you to know me. I have mentioned before I experience yoga as a healing modality for the wounded part of my soul. I’ll be honest these wounds were self-inflicted and a normal part of being human. Stuff just happens, bad decisions are made, and consequences are faced; boy am I the Queen of Bad Decisions. LOL!
This blog is not to self-flatulate or just wallow in my distress. I left the role of victim way back in my rear-view mirror. OK, maybe about 6 months ago. Nope, I have come to a place in life where I acknowledge my mistakes and, here’s the healing part,
I take full responsibility for those mistakes.
That has been the tough part. Ugh. Yes, I see that in every bad turn and wrong path traversed I had a huge role in what happened. It only took 60 years to get to this point. LOL! I didn’t even start on this journey until 2009, but once I did there was no holding me back. Jumping on a spiritual path is not only deeply personal but so rewarding and full of healing. It’s not something I can explain, or I promise you my dear friend I would tell you of the secrets it holds! Words just fail, but silence doesn’t. I’ve been speaking a lot about silence in my classes recently. In silence you have to hush, and listen, and ponder.
To those I hurt, persecuted, discriminated against, disrespected, slandered, wished ill upon (oh that was a favorite!), I am so very sorry, and I will gladly speak openly with anyone about it. I see I did those things because I felt that way as well. Through the many diverse paths of a yoga practice, I have been able to uncover equal amounts of compassion, grace, and forgiveness to combat all the errors and I’ll admit that was the hardest part. Did I already say that? It bears repeating. But don’t let it deter you. Join me on the mat, at one of the luncheons, in an email conversation, come over for dinner, or text me. Don’t let the greatest part of life pass you by…. Healing. Yes, that’s where I was, healing.
